It was at least a year ago that I was driving to my folks' house and listening to the song 'Hope' by Jack Johnson. It's a pretty peppy song, you can listen to it below, but the lines of the first verse really hit me and I just started crying in the car. I'm pretty sure I can't do the experience justice here, but I'll try. Read the 1st verse:
Shadow walks faster than youYou don't really know what to doDo you think that you're not alone?You really think that you are immune toIts gonna get that the best of youIts gonna lift you up and let you downIt will defeat you then teach you to get back upAfter it takes away all thatYou learn to love
What it was telling me was that for all the bad that disordered eating has done to me, for how defeated it has left me at times, it's something that I should take with gratitude, for what it has taught me, and for the strength of the experience it has pushed me through.
Likewise, it tells me that I'm not the only one who has tough things to deal with; we all do! Some are obvious, while others are harder to see. But we all deal with our issues and our struggles, and the best thing that I or anyone can do is to be 'that' friend. I'll admit that I'm not often that person, but I'm lucky to have many people in my life who are 'that' friend.
Life should be hard, we should do hard things. Most of the time, we won't voluntarily do them, while sometimes circumstances force us to rise to the occasion. Other times, shit just happens and we have to deal with it. I think that overeating falls into the latter category for me.
Likewise, it tells me that I'm not the only one who has tough things to deal with; we all do! Some are obvious, while others are harder to see. But we all deal with our issues and our struggles, and the best thing that I or anyone can do is to be 'that' friend. I'll admit that I'm not often that person, but I'm lucky to have many people in my life who are 'that' friend.
Life should be hard, we should do hard things. Most of the time, we won't voluntarily do them, while sometimes circumstances force us to rise to the occasion. Other times, shit just happens and we have to deal with it. I think that overeating falls into the latter category for me.
Conversely, it was well over a year ago, nearly three in fact, that I wrote about this Pearl Jam song and the effect it had on me. I like to contrast these two and take comfort in where my hard work at overcoming overeating has taken me. I'm not done yet, but I've come a long, long way. I will continue to be grateful for what good it does me.
No comments:
Post a Comment